A Weak Spot





Our sweet, darling toddler brought home a sickness bug from pre-school.


It was so bad, it took the entire family completely out of action for over 2 weeks.


Even Clarke, who never, ever, ever gets sick.


I don’t handle illness well. It is the one scenario that sees me trade in my anxiety for a low, depressed state.


I cannot get proper perspective on illness, mainly because l got sick once and stayed sick for years.


Whilst everyone else in our house was automatically confident that they would be back in regular working order in a few days.


For me there will always remain a sliver of doubt.


Even sat here now, fully operational once again, l could summon that doubt again if l did not consciously work on eradicating it.


It is not something l can do alone. Truly I have tried and l just end up going around in circles.


It is the same with my general anxiety, its a weak spot.


One that l wasn’t able to identify before it became unmanageable.


And a weak spot that most certainly cannot be shored up by me alone, once l am living in an unmanageable state.


I call it a weak spot, not because l am a weak person.


I don’t believe there is any such thing as a weak person. We are all miraculous and wonderful, every single human that l have ever met.


For me, it is nothing more than having a weak spot in our house.


A broken tile in the bathroom will be the site where water damage takes hold.


A worn out door handle will not allow a door to function properly.


These things are not to blame, they just need a bit of TLC.


I find it hard to bounce back from physical illness, on a mental level.


I am aware of this, and so is my husband.


So he supports me, both emotionally and practically.


Whilst compassionately insisting l seek professional help for it.


Which l am doing, because this weak spot can be fixed, just like l would ask a tiler to come sort out our bathroom.


What is your weak spot? Where do you feel most vulberable?


And how would you feel if someone lovingly suggested that you got a professional to cast their eye over it?


Those are the questions we would like you to think about today.


Love, C&C xx



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