Do you ever think you might be your own worst enemy?
Because honestly, I've just wasted twenty minutes arguing with myself about why I don't have time to visit our virtual bathroom, and do one of the relaxation suggestions in there.
I do! Clarke just told me to go take some time and do something for myself.
And. I. Can't.
Firstly there is Mum-guilt. Even though the baby is napping, and the toddler is with Clarke having a great time playing.
Then there is the old "But I could be doing something around the house." Which honestly would usually calm me the most, but our current living arrangements mean this is not the case.
So, as I said, I have decided to come to the actual Bathroom ,and bring the virtual Bathroom with me, because I regularly feel relaxed in both.
(I do that a lot, by the way; conduct the virtual exercises in the matching, real-life physical rooms, because it helps anchor me to the positive changes they help me make, and it feels like they get reinforced every time I am in that room.)
See? Fool-proof plan!
Except I am the issue right now, not the environment.
So it was not fool-proof, because I decided to have a fight with myself instead...
I tell you what, this whole Being Kind to ourselves, malarkey is HARD!
The bathroom is the wrong room for me today, I realise that now. Isn't it funny how something seems so perfect in theory but in practise is utterly wrong?
I am going to take the relaxation suggestion, from the list of suggestions at the top of our virtual bathroom page, that I read a book.
But, as this feels like the wrong room for me today, I am leaving the actual bathroom, to go cuddle up on the sofa next to our not-so-little, sleeping babies cot.
I feel like reading is an act of self-kindness for me today because it will distract me from the thoughts whirring around in my head... then they can slow down and give me a chance to feel more calm...
I am going to request that Clarke do the same later on and see what activity he comes up with...
Watch this space!